Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Randomize
