This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize