Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Randomize