TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
