Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
As shirtless as possible
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
