I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Randomize
