Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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