The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Randomize
