It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
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