Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
