She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize