Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
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