You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
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