Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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