on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
We left an ass print on the piano.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
