So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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