What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
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