i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
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