we have officially lost it.
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
