Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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