when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
