Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
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