quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Randomize