Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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