My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize
