OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
A+ Viking dick
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