the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
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