He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
Randomize
