imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
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I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
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Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
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