Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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