from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize