Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Randomize
