wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
it's like heaven, but drunker
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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