apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize