At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
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