it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
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