Christians are straight up FREAKS
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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