Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
Randomize
