i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
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