Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
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