I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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