Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
Randomize
