I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
