so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Randomize
