And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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