I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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