Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
