it's too hot outside to masturbate.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
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