Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
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