I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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