If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
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