I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Randomize
